Leaving the nest

I love my mother so much but we clash a lot. I told her of my plans to leave home. She didn’t take it so well but she knew why I wanted to. We negotiated how this should work but never came to an

After many years of being the perfect daughter of what seemed to be the perfect family, I decided to take on a new life that would brand me as the worst daughter from the not so perfect family.

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Taking on this new role did feel a little odd but at the same time it fit so well. It was the morning of my final exam and I had this strange feeling that what ever was going to happen was going to changed everything… but I couldn’t put my finger on it. Instead of preparing myself for the exam my mind was racing with other things, things that had nothing to do with a finance examination.

I arrived at my exam late which was a bad start, my heart pumping (from running up the damn stairs) and my mind all jumbled. Not the right mindset to be in for any exam, I struggled and panicked so bad that I went blank. From doing so many exams nearly all my life, this was the first time I had ever felt like crying and giving up. Time was up and so I thought that the feeling of not knowing what was going to happen that day was because I was going to fail and re-do the class again.

WRONG! Well it sort of was… but instead of coming home from school alone I had my mother with me. Something has been on mind for so long and the train ride home could not have been the most right time to talk with her. I love my mother so much but we clash a lot. I told her of my plans to leave home. She didn’t take it so well but she knew why I wanted to. We negotiated how this should work but never came to an agreement. 2 days later, I had my stuff packed and ready to go. It was hard but more so awkward. Doing something that I never thought I would have the will to do but I know deep down it was for the best. My mother tried to reason with me but I fought through my tears and whispered ‘bye mum, I love you’. Without even saying anything to my father or my beautiful baby brother I walked out.

A cold adrenalin rush filled my body. I was still and the only thing moving were the tears down my face. It was then that I knew everything was going to be different. The coming of realisation for my family would come later and I can only expect the hardship and struggle that awaits in my near future.

0 thoughts on “Leaving the nest

  1. In every new event there bound to be struggles and hardship, you overcame the first one..leaving home..i know it took guts for ya to do that, i pray that you will be successful in all future endeavors, and yes do keep us posted..

  2. Tiger! im so comin over 2 ur new fale even for a glass of fanta or a mean feed of chop suey & kalo! :L :L :L

    awww good luck with ur life away from home sis.. its gonna be hard at first and i noe ur a strong woman with a good heart all positives will be coming ur way 🙂

  3. takes a lot of courage to leave the “comforts of home” but, it takes that much more courage for a Parent(s) to ‘…believe, trust, hope…’ let their child(ren) go.

    i read this piece a while back and, i was pissed off at (you for writing this ‘out-loud!’) myself, because i had to acknowledge that the ‘whole’ reason i stay home is: “…not just that I am selfish but, because I’m comfortable (SCARED) with coming home to my Mom’s cooking and my Dad’s complaints about ‘what to do around the house.'”

    much love and respects for you, as well as, to those (family) that have reluctantly watched you go…

  4. JAYFFFOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! :):):):):):):):)

    Big ups to you for taking that step ……..I am in my twentys and still live at home why??? Because its cheaper and because im too FEFEVALE & PALA’AI to leave home. Soooooo I give it up to you MUCH LUV!!!!!!!

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